Help! I Want to be Pegged, How Do I Talk to My Partner?

Help! I Want to be Pegged, How Do I Talk to My Partner?


Bring it Up. 

It sounds simple, but it really is the only way to get that dildo inside you/penetrate your partner. But we’re here to help it flow more seamlessly than just laying it out so point-blank -- although we’re pretty sure that’d be effective too.

If you’re intimidated by the idea of bringing up pegging to your partner, that’s totally understandable. Whether you’re the one wanting to peg or be pegged, there’s a way to integrate pegging into a conversation. 

How Do You Tell Them?

@spicyychloebaby

TT can’t take a joke I swear 😓#fyp #ftp #pt #sauce #spicy #seggs #kinktok #pegtok #daddy #uwu

♬ son original - Chloé Lebacq

If butt play is already a dynamic in your relationship, bringing up the topic of pegging can probably be done in a casual manner. After all, your relationship already holds space for open-mindedness and exploration. Alternatively, if your partner has made mention of it before, asking for it (whether man or woman), won’t be too wild an idea. 

If your request to add pegging to your current dynamic has yet to be a topic of conversation in your relationship, how do you proceed? Our best advice is to work your way into it. When the mood strikes, ask your partner if they’d be interested in butt play -- if so, great! Take this opportunity to be gentle, take it slow and continue to build trust while the two of you explore something that has been previously closed for exploration. If you are able to incorporate butt play into your dynamic, it’s likely your partner will hear you out with a positive response when you request to take it up a notch by exploring pegging. 

If your partner expresses apprehension from the start, it’s your responsibility to respect that and not press them to partake in things they aren’t interested in. Additionally, make sure you don’t take it personally. It really doesn’t have anything to do with you. By not getting hurt feelings and by simply saying “ok” when they express disinterest, you’ll save the both of you some heartache. 

Show Them Your Perspective

@nunarachitv

#seeya #smirk just relax bro 😂😂😂 #rimming #pegtok #pegasus #pegallmen2021 #adulttok #stonertok🍃 #humor

♬ I can't - CalebCity

The same way you wouldn’t go into pegging without prep, you’ll want to ease into the conversation of pegging just the same. There’s two main routes you can take. Depending on the dynamics of your relationship, we’d advise either bringing it up in conversation during non-sexy times, or when the two of you are in the mood. 

Non-sexy times, as they’ll be referred to in this blog post, have its benefits in that your partner isn’t likely to say okay to something that they are in reality not okay with. Additionally, a “no thank you” could kill the mood and take sex off the table for that moment in time. While the less glamorous of the routes, asking your partner for their outlook on pegging when there’s a lull in the conversation will guarantee (or close to it) that you get your partners honest opinion on whether this is something they want to partake in. And, as there was no sex to be had in that moment anyway, you won’t be “killing the mood” so to speak. In taking this route, the two of you will be able to logically discuss what it would entail without an entanglement of emotions and lust. If you’re looking to keep the conversation light, follow up your questions on pegging, “What do you fantasize about?” By doing you have not only expressed your desire, but you have made space for your partner to open up as well. Additionally, it reads more like a casual conversation about kink and you aren’t putting your partner on the spot or making them feel as if they need to give you a yes or no answer. 

However, you know your partner better than we do and it may also be the vibe to incorporate your requests into dirty talk. Consider what turns you on about the prospects of pegging or being pegged. Maybe while the two of you are getting down to it you say, “It would be so hot to watch you be submissive, I have a fantasy of pegging you.” If you’re in the opposite position you might say something like, “I’d love for you to take control and dominate me, I have a fantasy of you pegging me.”

When Things Don’t Go Over How You’d Hoped. 

@thottyfrog

don’t be shy the g sp0t is up there for a reason 😌 #kinktok #femdomme #kinkyboy #pegtok

♬ original sound - Doja Cat

There’s something incredibly vulnerable about opening up to someone, even the person you love, about your sexual fantasy. Your relationship may feel like it’s in ruins after rejection, but it’s definitely within the realm of possibilities to bring your relationship back to what it once was before you confided in them about your  interest in pegging. To start, you should know that there will be some residual awkwardness but this shouldn’t stop you from recognizing and commending yourself on the courage it took to get your pegging fantasy out in the open. Just because your partner isn’t interested in pegging doesn’t mean that you should feel less than. You’re in your rights to express your desires and they’re in theirs to say that they aren’t interested. 


The most important takeaway from this blog post should be that this in no way should affect your confidence in the bedroom. 


Don’t Stop Talking About Fantasies. 

@ohomeycomb

💪🏼 and I’ll do it again!! IG ohoneycomb #fyp #pegtok

♬ original sound - miss macy

Seriously! Once things have had the chance to cool off, one of the worst things you could do is let this close a door of open, honest communication surrounding turn-ons and desires. If you’re able to bounce back from this rejection and ask why they aren’t interested in pegging and additionally, what they are interested in, you’ll be encouraging an environment in which both parties feel comfortable discussing their fantasies.


The more regularly the two of you discuss what you’re fantasizing about, the easier, and more casual having these conversations will be. 



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